Our Trash-Talking Toddler

DISCLAIMER: I shouldn't have to write this disclaimer, but I will anyway, because it's my blog.  Nothing in this post is to be taken seriously.  I am only writing this for fun.  Back to your reading.

I have written a number of posts about my children over my 3+ months here at Active Rain, but I wanted to take a minute to talk to you about something that is beginning to concern me:

My toddler daughter talks smack sometimes. 

Yes, our beautiful 19-month old little girl has recently developed a foul mouth.  In fact, I hesitate to share some of these things with you, for fear that you may contact the authorities and they will raid our home searching for evidence of improper behavior or politically incorrect educational materials.

The other day, my angel came into the room screaming, "TARDS!  TARDS!"  I was so startled by this, "What?!  Who? Huh?  Are you talking to me?"  Oh, I see.  She only wanted to play with the cards that she had seen on the shelf.  Disaster averted.  All is well. 

A few days later, she looked straight at my eight-year old son and said very clearly, "Dumb."  I was taken aback by this.  "What's that, honey?"  She began to whine a little, and she repeated, "Dumb.  Dummy!"  I then realized that he had gum in his mouth and she wanted a piece (not really advisable for a toddler, usually). 

She absolutely loves our cats, and she often wants to be around the "Kitty", but she can't yet pronounce the "K" sound, so it often comes out as a "T".  You can imagine the great laughs that has elicited when we have company over and she is begging to see the kitty.

As a funny side note, she was looking at a picture with me the other day of an outside scene, and she said, "Foggy".  I was amazed that she grasped this weather concept already, so I said, "Yes, it is a little foggy there.  Good!"  Then she pointed at a small frog that I hadn't seen, and said, "Little foggy."  Oops.  Yes, I see the little frog now.

She is at the stage where she will literally try to repeat anything that you say, no matter how challenging it may seem.  I love this phase, because you can say, "Antidisestablishmentarianism" and it will come out as "Tards".  Just kidding.  The inflection sounds identical to yours, but the word has no meaning at all, unless by pure accident.  On short words, it is usually very close.

We have a saying that my son started in our house when he was a toddler that we still use today.  When he was small, he would say, "Noooo, you not!"  Obviously, he outgrew this, but we thought it was funny, so we still say it seven years later.  We even taught our littlest one to say it now, only it comes out as "No.Ninnut!" followed by a big smile or a laugh.  She loves to be the life of the party. 

The other saying that lasted for awhile from my son's toddlerhood was "No.  Go away from me."  Not "get away from me" but "go away from me".  I loved this one.  He would say this anytime another kid was bothering him when he about two.  Believe it or not, my mom actually still says it to me when she is talking about someone bugging her at work.  This phrase is actually remarkably freeing and descriptive at the right moment.  I may start using it with telemarketers now.

I would share one last example with you, but I don't think my blog would be considered family-friendly anymore if I told you how our baby girl pronounces "Fox" these days (think about it and it will come to you).  I have placed a moratorium on reading "Fox in Socks" until she is a bit older.  Foxy Loxy is also out of the question, as is the phrase, "Crazy like a fox." 

Thanks for reading!

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