Another episode of "Those Wacky Crouches"!
This past Sunday, after church, I was talking with a friend of mine for awhile, and my wife and kids were at the church playground. My wife later related a brief story to me that I thought was hysterical and I wanted to share it here.
My son, who is barely nine, is a very big kid (just over 5 feet tall, wearing a men's size 9 shoe), but he is still really just a little boy inside. His little sisters were playing on the playground, and he was pestering me a little bit because he was bored and hungry. Since I wasn't ready to leave yet, he finally gave up and started playing on the playground, which is really set up for preschoolers and toddlers.
He went up (stepped over) the small ladder on the Little Tikes plastic playscape (similar to the one pictured to the right), then went under the little hole which leads to the slide and sat down. At this point, he was sitting at the top of the slide and his feet were about six inches from the ground at the bottom.
His reaction was priceless and perhaps better when delivered "live":
I could totally relate, since I was always the tallest kid in class myself.
Group photo day? I'll just go to the back and stand in the middle.
Sit ‘N' Spin? How about "Sit ‘N' Slowly Turn and Scrape"?
Monkey bars? Let's call it "walking along in the gravel while touching the bars along the top".
I won't even start on swings, see-saws, and other playground amenities that are really made for the very small.
On a completely unrelated note (nice segue, right?), my wife and I had a date night the other night and we were discussing what we must sound like to our kids when we are talking about pop culture or any other non-kid-related issues:
ME: Did you see the bearded boring man who blah blah blah economy blah news blah election?
PAM: I heard that the Britney was with the baby and the man!
ME: The new computer thing is really wow! Blah Hillary Clinton blah.
PAM: Did you pick up the card at the pharmacy blah blah?
ME: No, it was your turn to pick up the blah this time.
PAM: Fine. I also need to set up an appointment to .................."
At that point, their ability to hear ceases altogether, and the words become a mindless drone in the background, or perhaps we sound like Charlie Brown's parents on the classic "Peanuts" shows ("Wa Waa wa wah wah wah").
And I have the nerve to wonder why they don't usually respond the first time when I speak to them.
Thanks for reading!